Life is just a bowl of cherries

I'm sick. Sick, I tell you. We paid a visit to our small town's produce stand this afternoon where we bought copious amounts of fresh fruits and vegetables since our own dreams of a vegetable garden have turned to naught in the face of more rain than I remember in all my life. We have soggy this and mushy that and I'm utterly utterly devoid of any vegetable gardening pleasure which is usually justifying my existence during the heat of summer. My picket fence garden is not pretty. Not pretty at all, friends and my chances to wear my floppy straw gardening hat that Christy gave me whilst harvesting the fruit of my labors have been few and far between. So, we loaded up the kids to satisfy our need for tomatoes the size of saucers, corn on the cob as delicately yellow as butter, brown paper sacks full of plums, peaches, strawberries, onions, new potatoes and yes, Bing cherries. Cherries so red they are almost purple. And I have done nothing for the last hour but thumb the pages of my new "Country Living" for August and eat cherries. I'm sick. Sick, I tell you. My fingers are stained red and I don't care if I ever see another cherry. Well, maybe just for today. The window for cherries is so small and they just immortalize summer. Look at them in this bowl. Don't they just scream "SUMMERTIME" to you? I hope they have cherries where you are.

"Life itself is the proper binge..."-Julia Child.

Dwight Schrute

Have you seen the episode where Jim puts all of Dwight's belongings (including his wallet) in the vending machine and then gives him a bag full of nickels to get them out? Oh!!!! The many, many people I would like to do that to...sigh.

5, 10, 15, 20

Party Time

Slumber parties. You remember them, surely? I went to so many slumber parties when I was a kid-most of my fun birthday party memories stem from them. I loved the whole creepy aspect of walking around a neighborhood at night armed with toilet paper and a group of my best friends. We always played "Light as a Feather, Stiff as a Board". Remember that game? It never worked, although there was always one girls who swore her cousin's best friend was at a party where the girl actually floated right up to the ceiling and the key was to just cooooncentraaate. Stop giggling and focus! Here are the movies I first viewed at slumber parties (okay this will date me):

Goonies
Say Anything
Pretty in Pink
The Breakfast Club
Dirty Dancing (considered WAY taboo back then)
St. Elmos Fire

So Molly has been having sleepovers since she was six. And we've had as many as five girls at a time, but this year she insisted on including all of her most special friends. 15 girls. 15! And I thought, well okay, I can count on probably half of them so that's not too bad. All of them have accepted. All 15. Sigh.

So, in two weeks I will probably have to bid you adieu because my husband will have kidnapped me and you will never hear from me again. 15.

Here is the plan. They aren't coming until seven o'clock at which time I am going to stuff them full of pizza, nachos, brownies and slumber party cake. (Aside: I think I'm going to make the cake that I made for Jacy's pj party she had when she turned five. It's a perfect slumber party cake. Here is a pic...)

Clearly I have an obsession with birthday parties and their cakes. I have made the following cakes for parties: A sunshine cake with ice cream cone "rays" for Molly's pool party, a horse cake for the year we had a Hoe down with rented ponies, a tray full of cupcakes that looked like balloons (below) for the year we had a carnival complete with rented popcorn machine, cotton candy machine and Poppi dressed up like a hot dog vendor, rented jupiter jump and etc.

Oh! That was the year I made Jacy dress up like a clown and hand out balloons and sparklers when the guests were leaving. A traumatic experience for her to tell Oprah when she grows up. What can I say? I have a problem. I love themed parties!


So, back to the slumber party. After I fill them all the way up with junk food (crap). My plan is to let them swim for a while. Preferably until they're exhausted. Then I'm bringing them inside and we're going to make our Flip Flop Craft and paint toenails. Then I'm thinking we play "Freeze Dance" and "Twister". Then we will decorate pillow cases with fabric markers and hopefully by this time they are exhausted and I will pop some popcorn and spread out the sleeping bags and put in a movie. Pick up time is at nine a.m. the next morning. That should cover me, donchathink? My husband is seriously going to kill me. He's so tolerant. He never says a word about my parties, even the year that it was about 700 degrees outside and I had rented ponies for the kids to ride and I wanted to have a hoe down so I made him build a big bonfire and help the kids roast weenies and marshmallows. And I made him put on overalls and a cowboy hat. And I made him hunt down hoe down music for me. But he doesn't like his sleep to get messed with. Sigh.

I hope I'm still married after this one.

On another note.

Look at the newest Ipod that has come out. It is so tiny.
This was Molly's big present this year. That and horseback riding lessons. She will flip. I will flip if she loses this baby. Small electronics make me nervous. But she is a good girl. She also wants this American Girl Doll. This would be her fifth. I'm a sucker for these dolls. She adores them and devours the books. (Aside: I actually love playing dollies with the American girl dolls. They are SO fun and I act like such a child when I play them. The last time I played I actually argued with my daughter about which shoes my doll was wearing and said and I quote "Molly I had them first." Yes I know.)

Anyhoo, I've got to go make some breakfast for my darlings. And apparently get the Barbie box down. Great. This means I will be picking up little handbags and shoes and accessories for the Barbie house for days.

Happy Friday!

Family Game Night

Last night was Family Game Night. We have it about once a month at our house. We love games and our garage has three great big long shelves stacked high with games.

Here we are playing the Game of Life. Remember that game? I don't care who you are, this game is fun. Jason had a hey-dey buying real estate and stock and all Jacy cared about was getting married and landing on the "You have twins!" square. Her twins names were Jilly and Billy. Isn't that ca-yute!

We have all the new games that technology brings us. You know, all the DVD games and fun group games, etc. But the games my kids love the most are those old fashioned games that even my mother used to play as a kid. Life, Monopoly, Old Maid, Twister. We'll spend $50 on a game that we think they will just think is the coolest thing ever and they get the jacks out and play jacks for hours.

Our Family Game Night is an event because they are allowed to eat food that is normally considered taboo (crap) on a regular day. Here was our menu: Nachos, potato skins, quesadillas, mozzarella sticks, chips and salsa, bean dip and that chocolate toffee chex mix that is bad bad bad bad for mommies hips.

I will omit the fact that a drink was spilled on the game board and someone knocked their plate onto Mommy's new rug, where upon landing, Missy scampered over and began to frantically gorge her little min pin self. Bad dog.

Other than the food logistics, it was a great night. Go have a Family Game night at your house this weekend!

Crafty Chicks

A crafting we will go. A crafting we will go. Heigh-ho the derry oh! A crafting we will go!

Oh my goodness it has rained and rained and rained and rained here in our little Shabbee world! I'm about to cry it has rained so much. The backyard is soggy, the patio furniture is filled with water, the pool is cloudy, my poor chickens look like they're about to give up and turn feet side up and float away. It's wet here, friends.

So I have two little blonde girls on summer vacation who can't go outside and run off their energy so I've turned to much more drastic measures. Crafts.

We are a crafty family. Molly especially loves crafts and at any given point in her day will drop what she is doing and open the craft cabinet. For her seventh birthday (two years ago) all she asked for was a glue gun and a knitting kit. Seriously. God bless her.

So on Wednesday we made our weekly trip to the library and then trekked on over to Hobby Lobby, or as we here at our house call it, Hobbay Lobbay to find us a little something something.

Look at our ca-yute flip flops we made. Big fluffy toile and black rick rack embellished flip flops. This was a good one. No glue or glitter involved, just tie one on. It occupied them for over an hour and then when Daddy took us out to dinner later that evening to (guess where?) eat Mexican food they insisted on wearing them even though it was, yes, raining.

Here's my crafty princess herself.


Here's my other crafty princess who likes the finished product,but isn't too crazy about the process itself. Here she is mad because we used the last of the sequins and she was only on her first flip flop so the other one had no sequins. Such is life. Sometimes, things just aren't bedazzled. Whaddyreyagonnado?

Boy Meets Girl

I'm going on a date Saturday night! A date night! A date night! Oh, I'm thrilled. I've known the guy for years. Like 13 years (don't tell-that makes me feel old)! He's a complicated guy, messy, but tender hearted. Prone to whining when he's sick, but lovable just the same. Makes ya wanna wipe his brow. He doesn't show his feelings the conventional way, but instead brings home a pizza for dinner, hangs a birdhouse, puts the kids to bed, builds a special "I love you gift", folds a load of whites. He rarely says he's sorry but instead washes your car or brings home your favorite magazine and a candy bar. He really likes kids and never misses a dance recital, school program or softball or cheerleading event. He puts up with my dog and pretends not to notice when I sneak her into the bed with me. He never says a word if I don't fix my hair for days or wear makeup or eat huge bowls of ice cream. He watches all my bad reality t.v. shows and indulges me in my antique fetish. I think he's a keeper, so I'm going to get a manicure tomorrow and have my hair highlighted. I'm thinking of a new outfit too. I think I'm gonna try and impress this guy. (Can you tell we don't get to have much time alone????) Thanks for the overnight kidfest, Gram!

Barbeque

I'm so looking forward to this Friday night. We have invited several of our close friends and neighbors over for a fun cookout. I always hate it when independence day falls on a weekday. Working people have to go to work the day before and the day after so relaxing, stay up late get togethers don't work well because the knowledge of an upcoming work day hangs over their heads. It's usually the daddies who are checking their watch, ready to lay out their work clothes and turn in early, rushing the mommies and the kids to the car. Poor daddies. So, we decided to beat the system and have an early celebration.

Jason is donning his "Kiss the Daddy" apron the kids made and grabbing his tongs. He loves to barbecue. We cook out at least three times a week in the summertime. I'll prepare the chicken or hamburger patties or sausage or steaks. I'll spend an hour making potato salad and relish trays and dessert. I'll stir the lemonade, haul everything outside, wipe off the tables and wash the kids as best as possible (I am telling you the truth when I tell you that I can't send them outside for five minutes without them having dirt under their nails, between their toes and in their hair. I keep a soap on a rope outside by the hose because it is inevitable.) and set up the umbrella. Jason flips something over on the grill a coupla times and gets all the credit. "Oh Daddy, it's yummy." "Thanks for dinner, Daddy." or guests will say "You've got a good sear on that chicken. Thanks Jason." And he smiles like Bobby Flay and soaks it all up. Whatever. So, he'll get all the credit even though I will make the salads and the homemade ice cream, do all the shopping and decorating. But I'll let him have his moment, bless him.


So guests are coming over for a cookout and the kids are bringing their bathing suits, so hopefully we can all sit by the pool, avoiding being splashed, and visit without having a kid run up every five minutes to complain about thirst or fighting or injuries. And then, since we live outside city limits, the Daddies will put on a firework show for us at dusk.

I love summertime. I love the smell of "Skin So Soft" bug spray and the way the pitcher of lemonade sweats and looks so inviting. I love making homemade ice cream the old fashioned way with rock salt and three bags of ice, getting so hot that by the time it's done making it tastes like heaven. Love hearing the kids splash as they jump in the pool and the smell of their "Waterbabies" sunscreen. I love the way they fall in bed exhausted at the end of a long summer day spent outside in the backyard pool.

I'm so thankful that we have good friends and neighbors to have over to share summertime with. I hope you have someone you love to spend your weekend with. Enjoy your 4th a weekend early. Go on, get some sparklers. You can do those in city limits. Your kids will think you are the coolest if you buy a watermelon and some sparklers and serve them for dessert tomorrow night. See if they don't.

Cottage of the Month

Oh my goodness, have you checked out Jen's Cottage of the Month for June yet? I know, I know June is almost over. I've been busy okay??? But it is presh! Simply to die for...I wish I knew this woman! Hurry! Go over and check it out before June is over and July's is up! Oh, and check out the archives for March's COTM. Whose house could that be? Hmmm...those dust bunnies look familiar. (Notice the ever present pink plastic cup on the kitchen counter. Signs of real life? Yes, Mommy needs her pink plastic cup of distilled water!). Go. Now.

Thank you Thank you Thank you!

Okay, so you know I looooooooooooooove Shabby Miss Jenn and her ca-yute blog, but you probably didn't know that I'm a bit obsessed with her website SMJ Designs and visit it about once a month to fulfill my digital scrapping addiction!

So recently she was chatting about her fun group of girls and how they get together and craft and have a gay old time (insert Flintstones theme song here) and they needed a name. Apparently, I, along with my best gal pal Ash helped inspire her to choose one! That sweetheart gave me three freebies and I'm rolling in scrappy happy right now. Look at her ca-yute kits she gave me...







If you haven't visited her go check her out. Love her! You know what I'll be doing tonight! Thanks, Jen!

10 impossibly horrible things about me

You thought you needed to know, but really didn't...

1. Yesterday, I bought my child a horrible plastic horse that was very over priced and ugly jst to get her to stop crying when she threw a tantrum because I stepped on another plastic horse that was left on her bedroom floor for days and broke it. Lesson: yes, you may act like a complicated spoiled fiend to get your way.

2. Sometimes I avoid people.

3. I made five beautiful hamburger patties yesterday afternoon and a bowl of potato salad and a lovely relish tray all set for hubby to come home and grill on our new deck with our new patio set and a lovely breezy summer evening and he walked in a said "Hmmm, hamburgers, I was thinking chicken." and so I threw two pounds of hamburger meat in the trash without telling him because I was mad at my wasted effort. Starving people around the world are cursing me.

4. I took the kids to the zoo yesterday morning and we had a lovely morning free from the hustle and bustle of people and all the animals were out and being fed their breakfast so we got up close views of several baby chimps and the baby flamingos and we watched the lions being fed and the elephants get their baths and my darling cherubs pushed their baby strollers with their babies along the shady sidewalks and occasionally gave their dolls drinks of water so they wouldn't get thirsty and then lifted them up above the fence so they could see the animals and all was right with the world until a woman at the petting zoo would not allow my child, who had waiting patiently in line, letting the younger children go first, pet the baby sheep and had the gall to tell her she'd have to come back another day causing tears to well up in her lovely blue eyes, needless to say the sky blackened and the wrath of god was struck down upon said zookeeper and my darling got to pet the damned sheep.

5. I don't like chocolate. I know.

6. I haven't moved the refrigerator to clean under and behind it since we moved in and last week when my husband moved it to change the water filter, it was almost as if the dust bunnies were living. They marched out onto the kitchen tile in a little army of sneezy grime. Shameful behavior for someone who claims to be a clean freak.

7. I refuse to feed my children cereal for breakfast. That's got to by unAmerican, right?

8. I forgot to send my grandpa a birthday card this past week (do you ever forget things, I do!) and he sent me a sarcastic email saying "Thanks for the birthday card" and I deleted it and ignored him. I'm probably going to hell. What kind of grampa does that?

9. I don't weed my gardens, I spray them with horrible chemicals that probably penetrate our water table and cause birth defects and kill off baby animals and cause all sorts of environmental havoc. But I hate weeding so much that I'd trade the safety of the world around me to avoid bending over and digging weeds.

10. Sometimes I watch cooking shows or lifestyle shows and wonder how in the hell these people got a show. I just want to call the television networks and say "Hey I have this idea for a show about really tacking home decorating advice, mediocre recipes and totally brainless landscaping ideas. Are you up for it?". I mean, please. Aren't we bombarded with enough tastelessness in this part of the country as it is????

Luscious Links for Saturday

In the middle of dealing with a massive amount of yardwork, I have only two links for this weekend, dearies. Oh, but they are good ones. Go visit Room Service Home for some lovely browsing. I'm thinking of buying this rug. What say you?

And, am I the only one who hasn't heard of the container store? Heaven, I'm in heaven and my heart beats so that I can hardly speak as I fill my kitchen with wondermous trinkets. Like these retro vintage glass refrigerator boxes. My grandmother always stored her leftovers in these. Love them. The first Tupperware.

Thank heaven for little girls

Itty bitty, teeny tiny french manicures. I'm now cross-eyed. Pedicures to follow. When my eyes refocus.


"A little girl is Innocence playing in the mud, Beauty standing on its head, and Motherhood dragging a doll by its foot."-Allan Beck

Wildflower Memories

The ride home from our vacation was just a blast. It is so unusual for our family to have a good time on the trip home. Our pattern is cranky kids, messy car, Daddy worried about just getting home and the lawn that needs mowing, the animals that need feeding and the unloading of the car. Mommy is normally preoccupied with thoughts of grocery shopping, unpacking and laundry laundry laundry. This time, though, Mommy was smart! Mommy utilized the hotel's washing machine and I did all the laundry at the hotel the night before we left, folded it so that all I did when I got home was put it away! It was fabulous. And all I can say for Daddy and the girls is that they must have had a good night's sleep because the mood was light on the road home.

We stopped at antique malls and a little hole in the wall diner with the enamel tables and mismatched chairs and the daily specials that feature huge portions of mashed potatoes and those really bright green beans. And the pie sliced on plates that turned in the glass cabinet so you could just choose your slice. I wanted to ask the cashier on the way out if I could take her picture but I was too shy. Her nametag said "Dottie" and she had on orthopedic shoes and a hairnet and she was adorable. Why don't people in food service wear hairnets anymore? They should. It should be a rule. And they should all be named things like "Opal" and "Fern" and "Velma". And write the orders on little green notepads and stick it to the clip in the window and the cook should always ding a bell and yell "Order up!". Anyway. That's how it should be.

Oh, and we stopped at the most precious produce stand. We almost missed it. We saw it on the way to vacation and said "Oh, we have to stop there on the way home!" knowing deep inside both of us that we would be too tired and cranky to stop. But wonder of wonders we didn't pass by and they had the ca-yutest vegetable/fruit/flower stand I have ever seen! I wanted to just say "Honey, unload the car, I've found my life's work." and just take over for her. She sat there with her big fat paperback book reading away under her fan, waving flies away from her iced tea. They had the reddest tomatoes, the biggest herb plants and the greenest watermelons all stacked up outside. Big hanging baskets and homemade quilts for sale. I was soooo close to buying one. But instead I bought homemade peach chutney, apple butter, a huge crate of red strawberries (of which we almost made ourselves sick eating in the car on the ride back-not one survived the journey home!) and we all bought glass bottles of coke out of one of those old fashioned machines that has the bottle opener right on the front. They were $2.00 each but I didn't care, I just wanted to hear it fall out of the machine and use the bottle opener on the front like I used to when I was a little girl waiting for my grandmother to get her weekly wash and set in the "beauty shop". They taste better in bottles.

But the best thing was, not that I have a husband that will turn the car around to go to a vegetable stand, but that he will pull over on the side of a busy highway so that the girls and I can pick wildflowers.

I know.

No, you can't have him. He's taken.

I'm quite certain that every passing motorist thought we were insane. There we were on the side of the road picking flowers. My girls will never forget it. And Jason found a patch of wild blackberries. They weren't as good as the strawberries though. Sour. But very picturesque.






We combined our posies and stuck them in a water bottle to ride home with us. Unfortunately, the did not survive the trip and are no longer with us. But their wildflower memories live on.

Decadence

Have you seen it? "Marie Antoinette"??? Oh, you MUST! The sheer beauty and decadence of the scenery is enough to make me watch it over and over. The ha-yuge skirts and the dishes and little doggies. Oh the wallpaper. Do you think people really sat around and watched the servants dress the royalty and walked with them to their wedding beds? Was it really like that? Oh you must see it, you must!

Vulnerability

Can't ignore it. Can't make myself delete the emails without reading them. Can't toss off opinions and notions as secondary advice from strangers. Can't suck it up and move on. Therefore, must remove myself.

You must have been following recent posted comments regarding my documented neglect and carelessness with my children by posting personal information about my family on this blog. If you read this blog at all you must have read my scathing response to it and my inability to let anything pass has caused numerous people to email me and relate their own experiences to me and their own analysis of my posts on this blog since last October.

I am not the kind of person to take these things lightly. In fact, I take most things personally. I am that person who confronts the grumpy cashier in the grocery store, who doesn't ignore a friends thoughtless remark, but lays it all out on the table to clear the air. I have a hard time having people discuss me as if this blog were a public forum and then let it wash over me like so much blather from strangers. I'm incapable, friends. And since I've had very little response in support of my posts, it has caused me to rethink this blog.

I cannot begin to tell you how disturbing it is to me to consider someone questioning me as a mother who puts the safety of her children at risk. It is impossible to consider it if you know me in my real life rather than this blogosphere of people who casually log on to read a very edited version of my life. My friends who love me and read this blog know that I lay awake at night thinking about my children and what's best for them and how just standing at the corner and watching every pedal stroke my oldest daughter *name edited for privacy and fear of further criticism* makes as she rides her bike half a block down the street to her friends house to play where said friends' mother stands at her corner to watch oldest daughter *again name edited* coast into the safety of the driveway makes me think terrible thoughts about cars and strangers and how hard it is to let a child have any freedom anymore. All of us as parents must be more diligent in this day and age. It's inevitable that in the smallest of towns we must exercise caution and restraint and say no to those desires that any normal child would have as they grow older. I cringe when I see children, not yet teenagers, no longer children walking the mall alone or in even in groups. Or at carnivals or fairs by themselves. Where are the parents? When we were on vacation last week a little girl, probably ten, came into a public bathroom by herself. I was so paranoid for this child that I made it a point to walk behind her as she exited and made her way back to her mother who sat on a bench outside. I really wanted to stop and say "Don't do that! Don't you hear those horror stories of public restrooms!" but then I would be a denice and rubbing my nose in an area that isn't really my concern (recalled peanut butter and all) and who wants another one of those?

Or is she right? Is it my business to call attention to lapses in judgment? Should I be more proactive in informing parents that to let their kids ride their bikes to our neighborhood school is just not wise? Should I label myself as "one of those people" and let people know when their parenting skills need a little more caution in this scary day and age? Should I stop turning a blind eye and minding my own business and become a parent who "gently nudges" the world into a greater awareness of hidden dangers?

I just don't know.

For these reasons, I think I'm going to take myself offline for a while. I have to tell you, friends that there are between a thousand and twelve hundred people who read this blog every week. If denice is correct and there are weirdos obsessed with my life out there, this is a scary thing. (Aside: I know, however, that it would be hard not be be obsessed with my life because its such an interesting one-I'm sure you're spellbound each time you log on! Am I over the top or what?) It becomes not flattering anymore. I'd like to give a shout out to all you weirdos, though, and let you know that if you come a knockin' my husband comes a packin' and if you've ever seen a weirdo react to danger about their kids, just try him. But seriously. It's hard to be discussed in email and comment form (some of which I deleted because I found them uncomplimentary). We live in a small town and I find myself discussed much more than I prefer to be discussed as it is and to have people whose faces I wouldn't know on the street discuss you is very disconcerting.

So I'm logging off to think. I need to consider whether this blog is truly the journal I intended it to be and a way to meet good friends who have similar interests as me or something else more sinister. Have any of you friends out there had a similar experience with your blogs or am I all alone out here in the big black void?


I was going to discuss my fun vacay that we just returned from. Post a few fun pics and tell you all about it, but I choked. The denices out there have me scared silly.

I'll be back later to let you know what I decide.

today

i have seen six ducks today
one was walking down the street
looking lost

tomorrow we leave for vacay
amusement park here we come
on the road again

last day of school
no more pencils no more books
freedom at last

i lost my temper today
people make me mad sometimes
it's okay

my girlfriend is having a baby
sometimes it makes me want another one
but not too much

my little princess is getting over a bug
she won't eat much of anything
i tempt her with sweets
and chocolate milk

jason is changing the oil on the car
he is wearing coveralls
it is so cute

rain again today
i'm so sick of it
our lawn is like a big sodden sponge

my dog ate a dozen oatmeal raisin cookies
i had baked for our trip
she hasn't thrown up yet
i'm waiting

In response

Thanks Denise for your most treasured advice, put so succinctly and I'm sure in no way meant to piss me off. Sorry that your plan backfired. First of all, I forgot to mention in my Front Porch Musings that I would omit the need for nosy neighbors, not even considering they might be found in the blog community. However, well meaning these neighbors may be, I'm thirty years old and have a mother, grandmother and a mother in law who give me all the unwanted advice I could ever need or want. So let me just prelude this by saying, Denise, you have insulted me as a mother by insinuating that I am careless with my children's lives. You have, mistakenly, assumed that the picture on the blog post "Front Porch Musings" was my house. It is not. I never let my children play in the backyard without supervision, never let them go home with anyone who I don't know both the mother's and the father's lives and history inside and out. I never let go of their hands in a parking lot and my nine year old still rides in a car seat for god's sake. I don't know why I feel the need to explain this to you, but since you left no contact information and posted a comment on my blog for all and sundry to see, I couldn't help but defend myself even as my hands are shaking as I type this. Live in a small town we may, but god help us the world is smaller than we think and an anonymous person from heavenknowswhere can still leave you reeling with their unwanted advice. I don't think it was me who crossed the line here.

No nosy neighbors needed. Thanks.