Fall is in the Air

I really have nothing much to say today except that it is a gorgeeeeeous day and, sadly, I'm not going to spend much of it sitting here talking to you, but I'm going to go get out there in it and start tackling my list. But, dear me, I have such sa-weet friends who email me and say "Heeellllloooo???? When are you going to post something?????" so I thought I'd drop in and say HI!!!!

We are busy busy busy here these days. Last week I had a field trip with Molly to JA Biz Town. I think all schools all over America should be required to take their 5th Graders to Biz Town. It is a tremendous experience for all the kids and teachers involved. Read about it here. It is basically a little city inside a huge auditorium.

Businesses around the community have sponsored a mini-business inside the city and the kids run it! They work for weeks to learn about taxes and promissory notes and business licences and gross and net income! Then they interview for their job and run for mayor and have elections. By the time they go to this one day event, they are SO prepared! The day starts with each business applying for a business loan (And surprise! They are all approved!) and they have a CEO who is in charge of all the licenses, promissory notes, etc. and a CFO who writes the paychecks, pays the bills and is responsible for paying back the business loan. Then they have a town hall meeting, the mayor speaks and the businesses open and they go to work! It is SO cute. They have little construction workers

and little grocery stores like Reasors (pictures with Molly's BFF below)



and little CPA's and little attorneys. Even the electric man comes around in his little uniform and reads the meters. Molly worked at Arby's and I was there to supervise. Here she is in her uniform!



Here is the two of us together in our uniforms. Clearly I was having a scarecrow hair day. I don't know why Jason lets me out of the house sometimes. I look like the wrath of God in this picture, but whattreyagonnado?




You're really not supposed to help them at all because this is all for a grade so I was just supposed to keep them safe and if they had any questions I was supposed to direct them to their job folder. I was SO surprised at how well they ran those businesses. Here she is taking orders at Arby's.



They work for half the morning and then they get paid. They take their paycheck and go to the bank where they must balance their checkbook (entering net pay into their register and thus, learning about taxes) and opening a savings account. They pull out cash and they must go to Arby's (so all 100 kids file in different groups to Arby's where my little employees worked so hard to fill orders-a crowded place see below) where they had to buy their drink and snack.

Then they can "shop" for products at the businesses around town. When their break is over, they went back to work until their afternoon break and their second paycheck. It was adorable! At the end of the day, they had to close their business, pay back all their loans, if they could and clean up their shops. They set their own prices for their products to learn about supply and demand, so some of them didn't get to pay back their business loans, but that happens in real life too so it was a learning experience for all! I loved it and I highly recommend it!!!

So after an exhausting day at Biz Town last Friday, we had a cheer sleepover that night! 20 screaming girls and way way way too much sugar! But they had a blast and had such a great bonding experience!







Tonight we are decorating our float for the homecoming parade on Thursday during our regular cheer practice! I love homecoming! SO fun!


Here's my little cheerleader!














And of course, Jacy is still playing her little violin and totally loving her ballet class. So we are busy busy busy. She's very into helping me make dinner now and asks whenever she passes by the kitchen if she can help. Future chef?

Here she is with her little BFF's.

The fair is in town and last Sunday my girls went here with my mom and dad and had oh so much fun! They ate a ton of junk food (crap) and came home with stuff spilled all down the front of their ca-yute little outfits. They sold cotton candy at the IceCapades and with the cotton candy you got a silver plastic hat like the one that goofy brother of Sharpay wears. Can't think of his name right now, my girls would be saying "Mooooo-Ooooom" in that two-syllable way when they think I am totally un-cool. That evening I walked into the girls' bedroom and smelled the most rancid smell and said "What is THAT smell????"!!!! Molly had put the plastic hat on top of her lampshade where it was slowly melting and scorching the entire lamp. Hello? Fireman Joe? Yes, could you hurry right over? I think I overreacted on that little escapade. Are we NOT supposed to scream "Are you trying to burn the house down?" at our children? Oh. I didn't know.





My project for this winter, inspired by my good friend Jennifer, who is always teaching me about savoring the little moments in life, is printing out all and sundry of pictures from the past 2, yes 2 years that I have taken and never printed out and putting them in albums for my kids to look through. I may have to sell some stock to get them all developed, but I'm determined to get them printed. Wait, I can't sell stock. My stockbroker just jumped out the window and now we can't retire. I forgot.

Sigh of Relief

Strangely enough when I log onto someone else's blog and read about how hectic their life has been lately, it doesn't make me feel all chummy and it's a small world, but rather stresses me out and leaves me with the feeling that I should also be stressed out because, clearly, there must be some issues in my life that need stressing about. But as we know I'm very strange. So I won't wax eloquent about how hectic my life has been this week, but I will tell you what a breath of fresh air this day has been.

I love Wednesdays.

Halfway through and halfway done. On the cusp of the weekend and all that jazz. No one ever schedules sports activities on a Wednesday, so I can pretty much count on always being home for the entire day.

I remember when my girls were babies and toddlers and the thought of being cooped up in the house all day made me break out in a light sweat. Now I loooooonnng for days when I don't have to leave. When my car stays in the garage with the door closed all day long and the peace and serenity of a quiet house are like balm to my frazzled nerves.

Today was a good day. I spent the morning giving my house the thorough scrub that it so desperately needed whilst avoiding all phone calls and physically restraining myself from checking my email.

I think I'm addicted to email. Because of my website, I check it constantly, but I find I can't seem to go an hour without running to hit the Send/Receive button. But after answering about 50 emails yesterday I was spent and my email and I parted ways this morning. We are, however, back on speaking terms as long as he doesn't betray me again like he did yesterday.

I put a big pot of beef stew on the stove and it bubbled away all day long and I made Cindy's delicious biscuits and homemade chocolate chip cookies for the girls. When they got home my little kitchen helper, Jacy, and I made a crustless pumpkin pie so all Missy's hard work at her food portioning went out the window and she's laying on the rug looking like a sausage. Oh, wait that's me.

Speaking of sausage, last Sunday morning was the most beautiful day here at our house so we ate our breakfast in our pajamas out on the back deck. We had warm croissants with honey butter, sausage and Jason and I had pumpkin lattes that were to die for.

So because you are my friends and I am nice and it is now officially fall and I am not labeled an over-zealous weirdo for talking autumn, I give you my pumpkin latte recipe. I'm sure it isn't nearly as good as Starbucks, but it's pretty damned good!

Pumpkin Lattes to be drunk in your pajamas outside on a crisp day:

Stir together 4 cups milk and 4 Tablespoons pumpking in a saucepan and heat over low heat until steaming. Stir in 3 Tablespoons vanilla and 1 teaspoon cinnamon. Blend with a mixer for 15-20 seconds until thick and foamy. Fill mugs halfway and fill the other half with HOT coffee. top with whipped cream and a sprinkle of cinnamon! YUM!

While I was cleaning my poor neglected house today I turned on the movie "Practical Magic" because I watch that movie every Halloween. I actually only watch it because of the house. Remember my obsession with movie houses?

I love it so much. It's so deliciously shabbee and it makes you think of old attics and nooks and crannies and afghans and fireplaces and the sound of waves on the beach. Sigh.

And when Jason built me my picket fence garden this is what my head dreamed of. Of course mine doesn't quite look like that. Yet.

And who can forget Maria's cabin? I mean it is so overlooked! I'd live there too! In a heartbeat. Enjoy some deliciously shabbee images by touring the house here.

Whenever I take Missy on a walk around the neighborhood I have a terrible habit of re-decorating the houses in our neighborhood. Giving them more "curb appeal". Because our neighborhood is in a little rural area, you have the random cute-as-a-button-neat-as-a-pin house next to the house that needs to be bulldozered. But there are a few that just need a little love. So whenever Missy and I walk by them, we spruce them up in our heads. Put some shutters here, extend the porch there, rip out that nasty nasty landscaping over here. But today as I walked by my house, I did mine. And now I don't want to play anymore.

Do you ever look at your house with new eyes and suddenly realize that GodAlmighty you need to spruce a few things up? Was I so busy painting the damned piano that I didn't notice the guttering hanging off the side of the garage or the bushes that needed trimming or the woodwork that needed a fresh coat of paint?

Sigh.

So now I have a list.

So, as you know I have tried so hard to not inflict every web design that I do on you. I know it must get boring. But I just must must must send you over to the queen of blogs to show you her new do! Go visit Alison and see her new look and sign up for her Vintage Housekeepers Circle and wait impatiently for October 1st just like me! Hers was the very first blog I ever read. Sigh. The good old days. Before this addiction to the internet sunk it's claws into me. Not really. I'm a recovering addict.

And it's Cindy's birthday so if you go over to get her biscuit recipe, be sure to pass on Birthday Wishes!

My cousin had a baby this week and it was so little and baby-like and I almost didn't want to give her back, but kick her out of her hospital bed and climb in and pretend it was my turn again. I hope this baby fever passes. It is driving my husband nuts.

Ghetto slippers

My husband has these slippers that he wears constantly. I call them his ghetto slippers because he wears them until they have a flat tire, meaning, he wears the soles out and the bottoms flap around like a flip flop in the breeze. He wears them with white socks and with every imagined outfit. My favorite is shorts with white tube socks. I have to wash them while he's at work because he gets so mad if they are not waiting at the door like little patient dogs for his happy return home. When I wash them I hold them away from my body with my thumb and index finger. Ah, the devotion of a good wife.

This is my bedroom this morning. It is the most beeeyooootiful morning here so I thought I'd welcome it in.

Remember my obsession with clippings? I think it is inherited. This is what my girls do with their free time these days. They clip. And they glue. Every time they hear I am headed to the store they ask me to pick up some more posterboard for them. They glue their clippings to posterboard and hang them everywhere in their room. I finally had it with the thumb tacks and even one day (yikes) tape on their shabbee little walls and I relegated their creations to the back of the door and inside their closet. Sometimes I find them sitting with their friends inside their closet looking at the pictures of The Jonas Brothers they have taped inside.

Here are the promised piano pictures!!!! They are really terrible pictures. I was messing with the aperture on my camera and got fed up and had another cup of coffee. I really need to read about my camera. I don't have one single solitary decent picture of my piano because of the (darling) little milk glass lamps that sit on it.

It is not a GLARING white. Not that you can tell from this (crapola) picture. It is a dirty white. I scuffed up the surface and used a paintbrush that had been dipped in pink first to paint it. In spots it has ugly marks showing through that look like a mistake, but actually took me a long time to create. Ridiculous, I know. I despise perfection.

I have little pink glass doorknobs that go where the little hole is underneath my pink picture of a little girl in braids playing the piano that I've had since I was little. But the holes need to be re-drilled first.

Okay, see here is where I played with the aperture. Clearly too much!

Jason glued some dental moulding type trim in a rectangle on the front for me and then I ordered my appliques (or whatever they are called) from here. SO cheap. And so ca-yute and shabbee.
So that's it. I should've done it years ago. Years, I tell you! It looks SSSSoooooooooOOOOO much better. And now when you walk in the living room you don't think "Well, there's a big brown piano sitting there." Now you think "Ooooooh! How ca-yute!" Or at least I do. It's possible that everyone else is patronizing me. (Yes, Amber-pat on the head-it looks good! *Quick move quickly out the front door, she is clearly unhinged!*)

Candy Corn and Classrooms

For lordssake whatever you do don't buy me any candy corn.

I went to the grocery store today and it sang to me from the shelves so I bought a ha-yuge bag of it and now I can't stop going over to the darling little cut glass bowl that it lives in and taking a handful.

Somebody help me.

I also bought a witch's nose and some black and green striped stockings and a witch's hat with a spider dangling from the floppy end for Jacy's Halloween costume. She has now decided to be a scary witch which is probably best because, clearly, if she were a candy corn witch like she originally decided to be, I would eat her.

Am I driving you insane with my Halloween banter?

I'm starting to annoy myself.

I also bought a fancy schmancy suede notebook for another one of my annoying habits of the hour, which happens to be clipping random pictures of things I like and taping them in notebooks. Yet another fire hazard to add to my life. Otherwise known as: something for Jason to throw away when he cleans the garage again.

For years I've been collecting magazines. I have all the Martha Stewart's since 1996. And I love certain pictures, but I never clip them out because, well, there's something sacred about the magazines I love. And I really like going ten years back and taking a big stack and sitting outside in a lawn chair and reading them.

But there are other pictures I like. Say, things for sale. Dishes or a sweater or a flyer for a house for sale that is too ca-yute for words that I want to keep but I don't know what to do with them. (I know, I'm so strange. Shut up.) Yesterday I cut a picture out of my grandma's hometown newspaper of an old man in his army uniform. It made me think of my granddad and I just couldn't put him in the recycling bin. I made up a story about him. How he was so excited to get his little newspaper with his picture in it and how his wife clipped out his picture and used paste (you know, the kind with the brush on the end) to put it in his little scrapbook and she had on cat-eye glasses with a jeweled chain. All old men must have wives in my stories. There is something so sad about an old man with no wife.

But I filled up my first notebook with my eccentricity and I had to buy a new one.

Clearly I have no life.

Back to the meth lab.

Tonight is risotto night. I love risotto. Like love it in a way that if I decide to make risotto I look forward to it all day long and am in a better mood simply because it gets to be in my mouth for a little while that evening. I only like Basic Risotto, though. Not fancied up risotto. Like risotto with spinach and mushrooms or sundried tomato risotto or something. They are probably perfectly fine, but why mess with a good thing I always say. Risotto is like Macaroni and Cheese for adults. Jason loooooooves my risotto and feels the same way I do about it. I called him at work today and told him it was risotto night and he said "Yippee!". See?

Because you are my friends and I am nice I am sharing with you the very best Basic Risotto Recipe ever!!!!

Place 4 cups chicken stock in a saucepan and simmer on low. In a deep skillet, melt 2 tablespoons butter into 1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil over medium heat. Add 1 small onion, chopped and saute for 3 minutes. Add 1 and 1/2 cups arborio rice and saute 2 minutes more. Add 1/2 cup dry white wine and let it cook away about 2 more minutes. Add broth a few ladles at a time over the next 15-18 minutes, stirring it into the rice each time the liquid has been fully absorbed. Stir in 1/2 cup grated Parmigiano Reggiano cheese, salt and pepper to taste.

It's so awesome. You should have risotto night tonight.

Yesterday was Open House at the girls' school. Before we went I was sitting out on the front porch taping things into my little notebook while they rode bikes up and down the street in front of our house. I looked up when I noticed I didn't hear their voices chattering away anymore and Molly was talking to some strange person who has pulled their car over to visit with her. WHAT? I leapt up like Wonder Woman, cape and all, spilling tons of little magazine clippings all over the yard and ran like the chubby freckled woman that I am over to the vehicle prepared to say "What the hell do you think you're doing?" when I noticed that it was my neighbor that lives caddy corner to us in a new car. Pant pant pant. I think I offended her by saying "You know, you really shouldn't pull over in your car to talk to a child in this day and age. You about put me into coronary arrest." She thinks I'm weird anyway because I won't let my children go on walks around the neighborhood with her children unless I go too. Hell, I won't even let them play in the front yard unless I'm sitting out there taping things into notebooks.

The problem is I just watched Monday's Oprah show about the child predators. Well, I watched it for about 15 minutes and then I just couldn't take it anymore and turned it off. So I am even more paranoid that I was before and now neighbors who already thought we were strange with our chickens and goats and neurotic supervision of our children will think we're even more strange. Don't care, don't care.

On another note, my dear, dear, dear, dear friend, Jennifer, is opening up a store in our little town and I'm sooooooo excited about it and so emotionally invested in it that I feel like I'm the one opening up a store. Without, you know, all the stress and the financial stuff and late nights and well, okay, maybe I don't feel like I'm opening the store but I'm totally excited about it for her! It's a teacher supply store called Classroom Corner and it is also going to have little classes for teachers for like staff development points and classes for kids like arts and crafts classes and all kinds of fun stuff! She's getting her inventory in and I can't waaaaaaiiiiitttttt to help her unpack it. It will be like Christmas. I love school stuff. The inside of the store is going to be so darn cute, too. My most talented hubby is making her a faux front of an old fashioned schoolhouse to go on one wall and it is soooo ca-yute! It looks so much like her little logo-you wouldn't even believe it!!! If you are a teacher and you live near me (and I know you're out there, ahem!) you MUST go by and give Jenn the nod. It is opening Mid-October and we are all sooooo excited! She's having a fun Grand Opening and yours truly will be there signing autographs, I mean serving refreshments so come by and say HI! I'll let you know the date as it approaches.

In the meantime go visit her fun website!!!!

Stop it, just stop it right now.

Today I got up in the attic with the sole purpose of sorting fall/winter clothes and taking an inventory of what the girls need when we start to do some fall/winter clothes shopping. Although it seems like I just bought them an entirely new back to school wardrobe, the weather is turning cool and crisp and it has me in the mood for sweaters and jackets and jeans and fun shopping. So being the highly organized and frugal mother that I am (whatever) I thought I'd take the entire morning to sort and organize clothes. Plus Jason keeps threatening me with the g-word (garage sale-ooooo the horror) so I thought I'd get a head start on him.

Instead what happened is that I found all my fall and Halloween decorations so I drug them down and played with them and decorated the house for Halloween on September the 16th. I think this may be the earliest I've ever ever ever pulled down my fall decorations.

It's just sooooo gorgeous here. It was 48 degrees this morning when I sent the kids to school and I opened all the windows in the house and the sun just shone and shone and it was silent and lovely.

How could I not celebrate this beautiful day by decorating? Besides, Ruthann has me so in the mood for fall housekeeping I can't stand it. Don't you just adore her? I want to be just like her when I grow up.

So then I got down all my fall cookbooks. This one (my all-time favorite) and this one and this one and lots of others. And I made my grocery list to include all kinds of fattening treats like pumpkin lattes and applesauce cake and marbeled pumpkin cheesecake. Now all the hard work Missy has been doing to shed those pounds will be wasted.

THEN I spent the rest of the morning browsing online for still more yummy Halloween and Fall goodies.

Like all these scrumptious pictures you see from Gooseberry Patch and my I've-died-and-gone-to-heaven-store Victorian Trading Company.

So I then decided that I would start making a list of materials that I needed to make the girls Halloween costumes this year. Yes, I'm making them! Don't scoff at me behind your hand. I used to do that every year until their costumes got so complicated it was easier and cheaper to order them. You're so mean. Jacy is still going to be a Candy Corn Witch and Molly...sigh...she wants to be a hobo. It is so un-Shabbee I don't know what to do with myself, but hobo she will be. And dammit, she's going to be the ca-yutest hobo ever! I'm talking big flower sewn to a floppy hat, handkerchief tied to a stick ca-yute hobo. Work with me here, people. So my entire morning is wasted and it's all Jason's fault. Well, if he hadn't started saying the g-word this never would have happened.

Sigh.

Do I sigh too much?

Also contributing to my Halloween obsession is The Decorated House who has the ca-yutest stuff for sale at her Etsy Store right now. Ca-yutest! Like this adorable print...

So darling!

Friday

This is how I'm carving my pumpkin this year. Poor guy. He overindulged.

Do you ever pass a group of cows standing in a circle and wonder if they're talking about you? Do cows talk to one another? They should. I love cows. I know they're smelly and stuff, but they have the sweetest faces. And they are so soft when you pet them. They don't feel like you would think they should. But they are so stupid, bless them.

Speaking of animals, there is the most disturbing picture of a kangaroo on our box of animal crackers. It bothered me so much that I taped a piece of paper over it so I wouldn't have to look at it. They are "Mercer" animal crackers and the really delicious kind, so I love to buy them. But the poor poor mother kangaroo has this ginormous baby in her pouch. I mean seriously it is like 5 feet tall and her pouch is all distended and her face just looks like she's saying "Help me. Someone please."

When I was a child I thought I would grow up and know everything. Like everything. Like important things like what the sky was made of and all the names of the trees. Black gum, locust, walnut, elm. One of my favorite traits of my granddad was that he knew all the names of the trees. I thought I would when I grew up, but I really know very few. I should get on that. Trees are nice.

I painted my piano.

Yup. I did. As soon as I told you I wanted to, I went to the store, bought some primer and white paint and got started. Ashley called me and shrieked with me over it! She's the only one that would. Everyone else would be like "Um...white? Hmmmm...well it's definitely your style, Amber!" That's what people say when I do something strange and they don't want to hurt my feelings. They tell me that's my style. I actually love it. I. Am. Different. So I guess you CAN put lipstick on a pig. Oops. Sorry, too new?

Oh, and Christy likes it. Christy has no blog because she has an unexplained fear of the internet. But she should have a blog. She's wonderful and funny. I think all people that I know should have a blog. You get to know people so well when they blog. Jennifer? Ellen? Hello? I know you're reading this....

You don't get to see any pictures of the piano until I order some decals like the ones I put on the girls' ceiling. Remember that? I'm happy with it. It looks wwwwaaaaaaaayyyyyy different though. Jason walked in and said "What the hell? You painted a 100 year old piano????" and shook his head. But three hours later he said "I think I like it." So then I had to have a secret smile. I painted the piano bench pink and he said "At least the whole thing isn't pink." Which I had contemplated doing.

Do I sigh too much????

Aren't chubby southern women supposed to sigh?

Sometimes I think I might be too regimented. Actually I worry about this a lot. When things don't go "according to plan", I'm not one to freak out, but I certainly don't like it one single bit. I do not like Plan B days. I don't do well when something occurs like an unexpected bill, illness or scheduling conflict. I don't run around with my hands in the air yelling about stress in my life or anything like that, but I don't like it one little bit when things don't go my way.


Does this mean I am a control freak? Don't answer that.


I recently had someone very dear to me tell me that one reason she didn't call me to help her at the last minute was that I was a "planner" and she just didn't want to disturb that or inconvenience me. She was just stating what was a simple fact to her, not in an unkind way, but I was so sad. Not at her words, but because I started to wonder if she was correct? Am I really so "overly organized" that I can't be there for my friends when they need me because it's not on the agenda for the day.


Sigh.


I've been thinking about it all week.


Then yesterday, someone said "We need to give Amber a chill pill!".


Sigh again.


I'm too regimented, I know it.


This morning I scolded my kids a little too firmly for "messing around". Sigh. Now they are off to school and it's going to bother me all day. I feel like driving up there and pulling them out of class and apologizing to them.


I did that once, you know. When Molly was in 3rd grade and Jacy was in Kindergarten we had a terrible morning. I can't remember now what it was about. They had bad behavior and then I had bad behavior and they got on the bus very upset that day. As soon as the bus turned the corner, I burst into tears, got into my car in my pajamas and drove to the school and sat in the cafeteria until they got off the bus. Their little faces were so funny when they saw their mother sitting in the cafeteria in her jim jams, but I had to give them a hug and kiss before I could do one single thing with my day.


I have this pink Day Planner. Molly calls it "My Brain" because I simply can't do anything or schedule anything without it. My whole body shudders when I think about what would happen if it got lost. Every important phone number, address, email address, appointment, and reminder is in that book. I carry it with me everywhere I go. Maybe it would be good if it got lost.


I think that I have lost all sponteneity in my life. This weekend Molly is having a sleepover that has been planned for 3 weeks. Three. Weeks. And we are also having our very close friends over for a family game night that has been planned for about a month. A. Month.


Sigh.


I'm too regimented.


Today is my BFF's birthday. She is 30 today! Yay for you, Ellen, now you can join the rest of us who worry about our metabolism slowing down and the beginnings of crow's feet and you get to move up to the box that you check on those random surveys. You know, they age 30-45 box. Do you know what I remember about turning 30???? That my ob/gyn told me that since I was now 30 I had to also have a rectal exam during my annual check up. Nice. "Happy Birthday" she grins wickedly as she snaps on her gloves.

Sigh.

Here is Ellen at her finest.

Look, Ellie, I'm posting pictures of you on the internet without your permission!!! Are you going to sue me??? She was about 7 years old in this picture. Maybe 8. It was taken in front of our grandparents' store. (She is my first cousin, did I mention that? We look like sisters.) Whenever I talk to Ellen on the phone or send her emails I still picture her looking like that. She'll always be 7 years old to me.

Every childhood memory I have has her in it. She's my most special person. Happy Birthday, nearest and dearest! I adore you!

I'm thinking about painting my piano white. I've been thinking about it for about five years now, but I am so scared to do it. Don't ask me why. It's ridiculous, really. I've painted nearly everything I own that will stand still, but I balk at the damned piano. I think it's because it is an instrument and I have a ha-yuge respect for instruments. I. Hate. It. When idiots smash their guitars on stage to get the crowd going. Hate it. I shriek at Jacy when she waves her violin around in the air like a flag or uses her bow to scratch her nose. It drives me nuts when Molly kicks the piano while she plays to keep the rhythm. I think it must be that. But really isn't a piano just another piece of furniture? Or is it?

Here is what it looks like now.

Here is how I envision it.

This is Elizabeth's piano. You can view the rest of her ca-yute house here.

It is raining and I have ten million things I should be doing outside but instead I sit in here and type away and smell my roast cooking. I need to be trimming my wistera, painting the trim on my entire house before it peels itself off and walks down the road, weeding my vegetable garden and considering planting fall vegetables (note the considering), getting the leaves out of my pool and considering closing it this weekend (note the considering), nagging Jason to fix the guttering that is sagging on one side of the garage and considering painting the garage or at least power washing it (note the considering), cleaning out the damned garage and stacking things for a fall garage sale. But it is raining and so here I sit.

Here is what my garage looks like as we speak.

We had some friends come by the other day and Jason actually let them come in my garage and I was mortified. Over the summer we have just not put anything away so there is crap everywhere. After they came over, the big annual garage clean up got bumped waaaaay up the list. They probably went home and talked about how disgusting we are. Because, clearly, I am so important that people talk about me when they get home.

Shabbee Tip of the Week

I LOVE Mr. Clean Magic Erasers! They are so fab-oo! They are a very green way to clean lots of things!

• Use them on the textured handles of your refrigerator that you can't seem to clean without bleach (bad, bleach, bad).
• Clean your lampshades with them.
• Use them to remove cat hair if you have cats.
• Use them as a clothes brush to get the fuzzies off your black sweater or wool coat.
• My Grandma has linoleum in her kitchen and this baby is great for cleaning off the scuffs that shoes leave behind, which drives her crazy!
• Scrub your kids' vinyl lunchboxes with them.
• Clean the sticky residue that is left behind when you take a price tag off a picture frame (My ha-yuge pet peeve!)
• Clean your white wood trim!
• Use it to polish patent leather shoes and handbags!

I am convinced that these things can be used for about a million things around the house and all without using any chemicals at all! And about $2.00 each, you're saving pennies!

Yay for you!

Yes, please.

It is such a beautiful, sunny and cool day here. I have on long sleeves and jeans and my whole being is crying out for autumn. I am normally so loathe to let summer go and close my pool and start back to school, but this year it is in the air.

How can you look at that lollipop pumpkin and not be in the mood, I ask you? I'm TOTALLY doing that this year. Ca-yute!

We've been sleeping with the windows open at night and today I woke up in the wee hours and pulled the comforter up over me-it was chilly willy! Yay for chilly willy!

We are going to the football game tonight with lots of fun friends. I love football games. But they reeeealllly make me in the mood for fall and winter. Sweaters and letterman jackets and gloves and hot chocolate and yelling!

Every time I go to a football game, I feel about 15 years old again. And thin. Gawd, I was thin.

I am so in the mood to make a campfire and bring in bales of hay and sit around and roast weenies and marshmallows. That is such a fall thing to do.

I am in the mood for chili on cold days with lots of onions and cheese. And hot apple cider. Yes, definitely the cider.

I bought my fall flowers, mums and pansies from one of my bff's wittle preschooler yesterday. An inspired idea for a school fundraiser, I think to myself every year as I buy them there. They aren't in yet which is good because it isn't quite time. But I wish it were time. I want to put them on my front steps and in my window boxes and decorate with corn stalks and pumpkins and indian corn and kale.

And grapevine wreaths and candles and birds' nests and scarecrows and gourds.

I'm actually ready to rake leaves. Oh sure, I say that now, but the actual doing of it is another thing entirely. Usually I let them get taken care of the natural way in that, naturally, Jason will do it. Or a great big gust of wind will come along and blow them into the neighbors yard.

Jacy has already picked out her Halloween costume. She is going to be a storybook witch. Not a scary one. Definitely not and none with masks, thank you. She thinks masks should be outlawed and refuses to walk down the Halloween aisle at the store because of the masks or if she does, she buries her face in my side as I guide her quickly by. No, she is going to be a storybook witch with a candy corn hat and stripey stockins and a big puffy skirt held out by petticoats. A witch with lipstick, Mommy.

Most of these pictures were from the BH&G Website and the teeny ones are from Mary E. of course. My hero.

I'm off to dream of fall-ish things.

Confessions: A post for Ashley because she said I needed to post something

Confession: I love Scotchgard. Not the smell of it or the breathing in of it or the beryllium disease or the vinyl choloride aspect of it or anything, Gawd people, what do you take me for? But I love it's purpose. I am in love with what it does. I ScotchGard everything. The kids' backpacks, lunchboxes, winter coats, cheer bag, ballet bag, tennis shoes, Jason's work jeans, the furniture, rugs, shower curtains. Pretty much everything.

If you walk in our house, you might just slide right out again.

I guess I like the idea of a surfectant that germs and dirt can't stick on.

It's a mental thing I know.

I wish I could coat my children in it. (Not really.) Especially Molly. She can't walk out the front door without falling down and rolling in the dirt.

Sometimes I wish I could just open up the top of their little heads and spray in there so none of the filth and crap in the world can stick to their little brains.

Confession: I love sleep. I long for it. I taste it like a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich and a cold beer. I look forward to bedtime. My fluffy pillows and soft crisp sheets, gently spritzed with lavender linen spray. Cool nights with the window open. Snuggling. That's why I'm so highly pissed off these days that it is eluding me. Oh, lover, wherforeartthou????

Confession: I am addicted to Yoga. I love it. If I go a day or so without it, I feel crappy and tense. My favorite part is the Savasana pose, aka the Corpse Pose, of total relaxation. The laying there while they tell you which parts of the body to relax. Ahhhhhh. Dr. Oz says that if we all accepted that our body and mind relate to one another we'd be a much healthier country. Dr. Oz, Dr. Oz! You're so weird, Dr. Oz with your talk of excrement and female trouble on national t.v. But we listen to you, oh yes we do!

Confession: I have about 15-20 blogs that I stalk mercilessly but never comment on. Why is that? Do I think I'm hiding? Do I think I'm not worthy of commenting? Do I think they'd point and laugh at me in cyerberspace and make fun of me behind my back?

One of the people who I stalk ordered a blog makeover from me recently and I blushed and clapped my hand over my mouth like a little schoolgirl! Yippee! Says I. And then I told her so. I love her. But I never comment on her blog. I'm going to have to start doing that.

Confession: We went to a fun family function this weekend and someone there asked me the following question:

"So. Now that the kids are in school again what do you do all day long???"

Thoughts that entered my mind to respond:

"Well, the meth lab keeps me pretty busy."

"Well, I'm currently doing soft porn shoots on the webcam, so that occupies a lot of time."

"Well, I'm having an affair with my neighbor and he works nights so..."

"Well, I'm starting to get pretty damned sick of eating bon bons and watching my stories on the couch all day so I'm thinking about whoring myself out in the mornings."

Instead I said "Nothing." and ducked my head and looked guilty like for Gawd's sake I need to go out and get a job right now.

This person didn't mean anything by it. Why do I react that way? Why, I ask you?

Confession: My cousin is getting ready to have a baby and it is making me sweat and wonder if I'm getting too old to have another baby and if I'm really sure if my family is complete. And then I think "Yes, stupid! What are you THINKING! Your life is perfect right now." and then I think "Is it really?".

Confession: I have a major, and I'm talking major, fear of heights. When I would go skiing, I would have to ride the ski lift alone because anyone else in it wouldn't sit perfectly still and there was the slight chance they would jar me and I would plummet to my death.

When we were at the symphony this summer with the kids, we sat in the first row of the balcony and I ruined everyone's experience by first falling into my seat screaming about vertigo and getting really intimate with the man in the aisle seat, and secondly smacking the kids everytime they leaned out to rest their arms on the balcony railing to see more closely seeing their tiny bodies falling on the viewers below over and over again.

Was that more than you needed to know?